


Kimi ga Inakucha

by looselybaker



Category: BanG Dream! Girl's Band Party! (Video Game)
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Established Relationship, F/F, Fluff, Marriage Proposal, touring hhw AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-06
Updated: 2020-11-06
Packaged: 2021-03-08 17:22:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27410395
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/looselybaker/pseuds/looselybaker
Summary: She was going to ask Misaki to marry her.There was no doubt that the feeling was mutual; she wanted to spend her life with her.  And yet, her nervousness was persistent.The problem was notifshe would say yes.  It washowshe would say yes.
Relationships: Okusawa Misaki/Seta Kaoru
Comments: 8
Kudos: 35





	Kimi ga Inakucha

**Author's Note:**

> thanks to lolda for the touring hhw au!

In her seat at the kitchen table, Kaoru’s boot subconsciously tapped against the floor, fingers woven together at her lap and stomach twirled in knots. She unclasped her hands’ grips on one another, fixing her coat and smoothing it down to have something to do. As her palm ran down the side, it lingered at the pocket, feeling at a firm shape beneath the fabric.

She slowly allowed her arms to hang limply beside her as she leaned back in the wood chair with a soft creak, a sigh escaping her lips. Her eyes aimlessly wandered about the large hotel room’s interior that she was only just becoming familiar with; distantly, behind the door, she heard a crash and a thump, followed by giggling, followed by a stern, exasperated voice as it reprimanded the culprits.

Her leg began to bounce, head tilting back towards the ceiling. She reached to grip at the bulge in her right pocket again. Her fidgeting grew quicker, pulse rising and chest tightening.

They were back in Tokyo for the first time since… She looked down to count the months on her fingers. A long time.

Touring had taken her and the band far away from their home town. Though the thrill of travel and the joy of performing to thousands of people on all different stages was unmatched, Kokoro’s idea of returning briefly for the holidays was one she and the rest of Hello, Happy World!’s members jumped at.

And it was not only an opportunity for a well-deserved break and various family visits. She had been waiting for a lull amidst the constant shows, long drives, and tired songwriting sessions to do something she had been thinking about for much longer than she’d care to admit.

Kaoru slipped her hand inside her coat and gently ran it along the smoothness of the tiny box sitting comfortably within. Its small weight felt heavy in her pocket, serving as a constant reminder. She swallowed with slight difficulty.

She was going to ask Misaki to marry her.

They had even discussed marriage before, and there was no question: this was what they both wanted. They had been through it all since high school, and never spent a moment apart even as the years passed. There was no doubt that the feeling was mutual; she wanted to spend her life with her. And yet, her nervousness was persistent.

The problem was not _if_ she would say yes. It was _how_ she would say yes.

She had already decided she was going to do it this evening. After they had all visited the newly-remodeled aquarium as planned, she would ask to take a walk with her alone, and she knew exactly where she would get down on one knee. She knew her girlfriend would be happy.

But despite the fact, worry ate away at her like a pain that wouldn’t fade, causing her heartbeat to quicken and her palms to grow clammy. She desperately wanted to do it right.

A familiar, muffled voice suddenly came from one of the bedrooms, “We’re going to be late, you’re the one who wanted to go in the first place! Stop messing around and finish getting ready, would you? And that means you too, Hagumi!”

Kaoru heard the knob turn. Quickly, she sat up straight, hand recoiling from the inside of her coat and arms crossing innocently across her chest. Just in time, the door opened to reveal a certain exhausted DJ, pulling it shut behind her before walking over and slumping into a chair of her own.

“Ahh, Kaoru-san,” Misaki sighed, draping one leg over the other as she reached up to adjust her hat, “I don’t know how I’m going to make it through the day with those two.”

She smiled at the honorific from high school that she addressed her with out of habit so often that it felt like a nickname. “Mm, ever full of energy, are they not?” Kaoru said, bending to place a chaste kiss on the other’s cheek.

“Yeah, it’s cute until we don’t get out the door for another half hour.” Misaki leaned her head into the embrace, the corners of her lips twitching upwards.

She said nothing; only let loose a small hum of contentment as she rested her chin on the brunette’s shoulder over the table.

She felt Misaki absentmindedly begin to run her fingers through her hair, soft grin now fully present on the other’s face. “This’ll be pretty cool though, huh? Seeing the old aquarium and stuff,” she said, gently untangling a persistent knot.

“Indeed. I find myself anticipating not only the remodel, but visiting our old friend,” Kaoru replied. She felt herself begin to melt beneath the casual contact.

Misaki tilted her head, “Old friend?”

“Misaki! Little kitten Pen-chan, of course?”

At this, she let loose a chuckle, “Ahh, how could I forget. I hope Kanon can forgive me.”

They shared a mutual laugh, Misaki briefly kissing the top of her head before reaching for her phone with her other hand and beginning to reply to various emails.

Kaoru felt a sense of ease wash over her as they remained nestled into one another, happy to sit in semi-silence with the only noise being the occasional crashing and thudding from down the hall. Her head rose and fell from her spot on the other’s shoulder induced from the steady breathing in and out. She could hear it, too. It was music to the ears, her inhales and exhales the perfect backing track to the soothing sensation of her free hand’s fingers still grazing her scalp. Not a word was spoken; it was a comfortable silence.

This was her chance.

“Misaki dearest,” she started. She cleared the great lump in her throat.

“What’s up?”

“Perhaps when we return, you might want to take a walk with me? A, around town.” Kaoru stumbled. She willed her pounding heart to quiet, feeling as if it would be heard elsewhere than from the inside of her ears if she wasn’t careful.

“Sure, sounds nice, Kaoru-san. Haven’t had some alone time in a while, huh?”

“Excellent! Indeed, that is true.”

She struggled to keep a level tone. Her hurried breath still refused to steady even after the deed was done. It was the thought in her mind that the simple confirmation meant one thing: today really would be the day. The prospect sent her heart aflutter and caused her chest to tighten all at once.

Her head turned upright from laying on the other girl’s shoulder to face the bedroom door as it could be heard finally creaking open. Misaki’s own eyes flickered up from her phone screen as the bodies of Kokoro, Hagumi, and Kanon piled out, the energetic duo looking raring to go while Kanon harbored her own, more subtle, quiet excitement.

As she sat up straight, Kaoru felt Misaki plant one last kiss to her forehead before rising from her seat. “Let’s get going, you guys. You want lots of time there before it closes, don’t you?”

With a mutual shout of agreement, Misaki made to lead the charge out of the door at long last.

And as Kaoru walked to follow beside, she felt her shoulders relax at the warmth of the DJ subtly reaching to take her hand, fingers playing over her palm.

—

“Feels like just yesterday we were making the walk home together from school.”

Her arm gently swung back and forth as they walked hand in hand across the familiar bridge, taking in the nostalgic scenery as they went. Every dip in the road and every building lining the sidewalk was recognizable; the result of having made the journey back and forth along the very same path for so long. The trees were slowly being stripped bare of their foliage in time for the fast-approaching holidays, creating an atmosphere of excited anticipation for the end of the year.

“That you’re right about, my dearest. I look back on the memories with great fondness,” Kaoru replied, subconsciously having drifted closer to her as their shoulders almost touched.

She watched as Misaki’s head twisted around, eyes seeming to drink in every detail of their surroundings. “It feels kind of strange, doesn’t it? Like I shouldn’t be here, or something,” she mused, gaze intently following a leaf in its graceful descent to the pavement.

“Does it truly? On the contrary, I find it enjoyable to walk the footsteps we once did together.” With each passing step, the pounding of her heart grew quicker still.

Misaki appeared thoughtful for a moment. “You know, you’re right. Not much has changed around here, huh?” she commented, looking up and down the path at the distinguishable structures and landmarks that remained.

“Only that you are even more beautiful than you were back then.” She prayed the other couldn’t feel the clamminess of her palms or hear the slight stammer in her voice.

The brunette only coughed and pulled her jacket closer in reply, though her face was a rosy pink beneath the disguise of her collar.

The chill in the air bit just that little bit harder as the sun began its descent. With it, Kaoru’s nerves continued to plague her, butterflies doing wild dances in her stomach that only grew as they neared, closer and closer. The walk was filled with pleasant banter and flowing conversation, of days long gone and plans for the ones that followed.

She always found it comforting and calming to talk to Misaki, though on this particular evening, no topic could drown out the deafening hammering of her pulse in her ears. Her eyes lingered on the face she loved oh so much as its piercing blues admired the surroundings with a silent thoughtfulness.

Her chest tightened at the sight, constricting her with a profound feeling that caused her breath to hitch in her throat. It was a nervousness, born from an overwhelming amount of love and care for the girl beside her who held her heart in her hands; a desperate desire to make sure everything was done perfectly, just as she deserved.

Kaoru’s free hand subtly grazed the pocket of her coat, making sure for the hundredth time that the hard outline of the box was still present beneath her touch. Her fingers subtly closed around the shape from outside the fabric, gripping it tightly. She took a deep breath in an attempt to force the emotions down for the time being, willing herself to calm.

She wasn't allowed much time to steady herself. It wasn’t long before the destination was reached, both stopping short by the entrance to gape at the surroundings.

The park in all of its glory was empty, painted with the sunset’s orange rays as the breeze temporarily seemed to still, as if just for them. It was nearly identical to how it was those years ago; a sight that induced many a memory from many a time.

“Would you like to take a seat?” Kaoru motioned to a certain bench a few short strides away.

Misaki only seemed to stare for a moment before she blinked, “Sure.”

The other’s fingers fell from Kaoru’s grasp, leaving her hand cold for the first time in a while as she moved to sit down. Misaki settled to her right, just as it was back then.

And as the sun hit her face, igniting her ivory skin in a bright coral, she was suddenly entranced. The almost innocent way her muted gaze scanned every old seat, the rusted slide, the fragmented pebbles littering the dusty dirt. The way she had her hands on her lap, slightly leaned forward, reminding her almost exactly how she used to sit in her school uniform in the very same spot. And the way she suddenly turned to lock eyes with her, the corners of her lips slightly curving upwards to smile her small, warm smile with the tilted head.

She was fortunate the brunette spoke, lest her dumbstruck silence became noticeable.

“You know, I kind of wish you brought your guitar,” Misaki chuckled softly, half-joking. “Now’s really the perfect time to hear you play, just like you used to do when we came here.”

Kaoru let loose the breath she didn’t realize she was holding, “An excellent idea; the atmosphere remains incomplete without my delightful tunes, of course. Perhaps we might find time to come again before we leave, no?”

“Uh-huh. That would be nice.”

A lull, a brief silence.

“Misaki,” Kaoru said, and her voice shook a little this time, she was sure of it, “do you perhaps recall one such conversation had on this bench?”

To her surprise, the other girl nodded, a faint smile on her features. “Mm, yeah, I think I do. You told me once, ‘Every version of me is me.’ Is that the one you’re talking about?”

“I, ah… Yes, yes indeed.”

Her expression grew soft, gaze transfixed ahead on the park bathed in orange in its entirety. “You know, Kaoru-san, I never really thanked you directly for that,” she said quietly.

This wasn’t according to plan.

“You helped me more than anyone else did that day, and you didn’t even know it. You didn’t say anything about it.”

“I…”

A wistful look appeared in her eyes, lips still formed in a gentle smile. “But I think maybe you did know, didn’t you? Thank you.”

“I…did nothing worthy of praise, my love. Your growth is your own.”

“That’s true. But you helped me a lot. I think that’s worth something, don’t you?” Misaki shrugged her shoulders, head turning away to examine a particular section of the playground. “Anyways, were you going to say something?”

Kaoru took a deep breath, attempting once more to still her thrumming heart. “I was.”

But she was at a loss. The kindness in the other's voice, the sincerity written in her face, everything about her as she shone in the sun like some sort of celestial gift from above. It was so good, it felt dangerous.

Suddenly, the words were spilling from her lips, like a dam had been broken for the river now rushing forth.

“I, I’m just ever grateful for you, Misaki. More than anything. The time spent with you, the words you say, the memories we share, your utterly beautiful smile, being able to wake up next to you and perform as always. I-in the beginning, I believe it was my intention to help you, but you help me so much, I… Simply put, it is the very definition of fleeting. To, to quote Shakespeare, ‘Love sought is good, but given unsought, is better.’”

She slowly slipped off the bench to plant a knee in the dirt, reaching into her pocket to take the ring from the box that now felt as if it fit perfectly gripped between her fingers.

And she watched as Misaki turned around to face her, eyes going wide as they fixed on her shaking hands, then to her own crimsons. “Kaoru?” she breathed.

“Misaki, my, my dearest, what I’m trying very poorly to say is I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I want to make you happy, with my entire being.” She stared up at her from her kneel, filled with pure emotion. “I need you.”

“Will you marry me?”

Misaki nodded; once slight, then enthusiastically, up and down. “Yes, yes. Oh, god, yeah, yes.”

The DJ wasn’t given much time to repeat affirmations as Kaoru hugged and hoisted her up, feeling Misaki’s arms wrap around her shoulders and legs lift off the ground as she twirled her around in a mess of laughs and cries.

She felt as if her heart would burst as she set Misaki down to squeeze her tighter, hands gripping the soft fabric of the back of her sweater and the other girl burying her head in the crook of her neck. She could feel her warmth, breathing in the scent that was uniquely hers and embracing her so closely, she thought she might have just melted into her.

“I love you. I love you so much.” Misaki pulled away only to briefly look into her eyes before cupping her face and leaning in for a deep, long kiss, gently rocking from foot to foot in time with her. Kaoru’s hands brushed the bangs from the other girl’s face as their lips danced, savoring the way her soft locks cascaded between her fingers while they ran through. All that existed was her.

“Mm, ah! The ring!” Kaoru regrettably parted from her to slip the band on Misaki’s right with great care. The brunette held her hand up as the jewels glinted in the light of the sunset, admiring it from every which way.

“It kinda looks like a flower. Wow, I…” She simply gazed at it in silence for a moment before returning back up to her with a tearful smile. “I love it. I love you, Kaoru-san,” she said once more, thumb tenderly grazing her cheek.

“I love you so, dearest,” Kaoru echoed, eyes fluttering shut as she lost herself in the moment. The touch, the warmth, the thoughts of what was to come.

And as she felt the butterflies in her stomach, she was sure they were for a completely different reason.

**Author's Note:**

> one day my brain went "what if kaoru proposed to misaki on the bench from band story 2" and then this happened!  
> so, ramble alert, i don't normally write stuff in kaoru's "POV", mostly because people have different opinions on what goes on in her head and if her thoughts line up with her "persona", etc. and i feel misaki's perspective is more enjoyable to read and relatable anyways. but i decided to take this route since the plot focuses mainly on her. it was a joy to write, i hope she wasn't too ooc here, i feel like this would be something she'd be really worried about so i wanted to reflect that while still maintaining her naturally upbeat and dramatic personality.  
> ANYWAYS i just had a lot of thoughts about this one i am so so sorry. my heart was so very soft writing this, i really hope i was able to depict just how much they care about each other, i feel there are lots of things to improve on but still quite happy. tons more ideas i can't wait to start, any and all feedback is welcome, thank you so so so much for reading!!!😭❤️️❤️️❤️️


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